Sixty Is Sexy!

In celebration of bikes, beer, recreational cannabis, friends and family, reproductive choice, a new number in the "tens" position of one's age, and the hope that, even as a person shuffles ever closer to the grave, they can still put a little dance in their step, a little wiggle in their walk, a little schwing in their stride, and with a little luck, retain a modicum of the very appeal that makes all human life possible, 327 Words proudly presents the Sixty Is Sexy! Time Trial, an alleycat-style bike race featuring loads of hot and nasty checkpoints and plenty of naughty performance detraction options  beginning at 2020 Cycle at 21st and Union in Seattle, WA on Saturday, April 1, 2017 at 3:27 sharp, signups commencing around 2:30 or so.

Come on out and put the fun between your legs in order to ride hard (or nice and slow as you like it.)

Riders, getting racy in a group time trial format, will titillate their senses and get smokin' hawt as they arouse themselves to some of our fair city's most alluring locales.

NOTE: More or less accurate Strava route, with some additional miles at the end that should be ignored:

https://www.strava.com/activities/914594737

That's right, uh-huh, sex on (two) wheels, rain or shine, no crying or fatal crashes allowed.  Ten bucks suggested donation, (includes a $2.00 donation to Planned Parenthood) with free shot glasses for the first 60 riders,

Prizes—cash and bike schwag—to be awarded for fastest times, men’s and ladies’ divisions, as well as runner-up positions, including, of course, DFL.

Prize sponsors and friends currently on tap or being recruited include:Portland Design Works, Sock Guy, Liquid Courage Flasks, Pabst Blue Ribbon,  2020 Cycle, Oury Grips, Swift Industries, Vapolution Vaporizers, SKS Germany, Walz Caps,  Peddler Brewery, Pace Sportswear, Bar Mitts, Kryptonite Lock, Toast Tea Threads, Ooola Distillery, Wood Shop BBQ, Cyclefab, All-City Cycles, Twin Six and, Cars-R-Coffins.

Embrace this chance to make some sweet, sweet bike love, and always remember, Safety Third!

Friends, relations, and those too lazy to ride, but not to drink, are invited to show up at Bill's Off-Broadway  after about 6:00 for more sensual delights, and stimulating prizes, too!